Let me let you in on a little secret. None of us have it all figured out. Even though we may be creating the perfect virtual life on Facebook and Instagram none of us actually live that way 24/7. Even though we may appear to have it all together and have it all figured out, each of us has something we struggle with and battle daily. In the wonderful world of women we live in, I’ve noticed how we like to wear different masks depending on who we’re with and what environment we’re in. We like to pretend everything is perfect and we haven’t walked through some serious stuff.
We like to pretend our marriage is perfect, our kids are perfect, our parenting is perfect, our family is perfect, our finances are perfect and our walk with God is perfect. We don’t want anyone to find out that we don’t know what we’re doing sometimes or that we have no idea how we will make it work. We don’t want anyone to know that some days we just want to quit.
Today, I give you permission to stop hiding. I give you permission to stop pretending. Let’s just be real. Let’s be real with where we’re at and who we’re with. Let’s be real about our struggles and imperfections. Let’s be real about what we’ve overcome. Let’s be transparent with our lives and let people in so they can speak life. I’ll go first.
My entire life I have learned how to stuff emotion and get the job done. I rarely cry and have a very hard time letting it out. My friends often characterize me as rock solid. I don’t give into hysterics, panic, or meltdowns. So I’ve learned to always be the rock. To be clutch in a crisis. To always be unaffected and moving forward. By the grace of God, 80% of the time this is true.
But then there’s the other 20%. 20% of the time I fight anger, bitterness, apathy, and weariness. 20% of the time I want to quit and I can easily fall into pride, jealousy, offense, and competition. I have to daily fight and be intentional about protecting my heart. God has transformed my heart in so many ways but there is still so much that needs to be healed. I’m not always motivated, driven, organized, or on task. I’m prone to burn out. And if I’m really transparent sometimes I just want to get in my jeep and listen to Sheryl Crow while smoking cigarettes and drinking Jack Daniels. But I don’t. Here’s how:
In being transparent, I can invite others in to speak into my life. I can develop real friendships where it’s OK for someone to call me out and see me at my weakest. In being real, I let others know I’m human.
When we go through things and overcome them, that’s our chance to give others hope. One of the biggest lies of the enemy of your soul is to isolate you and get you thinking you’re the only one. You’re not. This is why God designed us for relationships. We are creatures of community for a reason. God speaks through people. We are the light. We are the hope bearers. So in being transparent with your life and your struggles you can receive hope and GIVE hope. You don’t have to have it all together to give hope!
On the flip side, being real is not about walking around complaining and talking to people only about drama 24/7.But it is about being open and real and letting go of the pressure to have it all figured out and have everything together. Life is about continually transforming and getting better each day. We won’t ever be perfect but we CAN overcome.
Being Real,
Lindsey Nadler
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